Day 311 – Shy That Way

55 – 100 Tips To Overcome Shyness

There is something inherently odd and amusing to me in the idea of a book about overcoming shyness. I understand the appeal of reading how to be less shy, but obviously, sooner or later you’ll have to get your nose out of that book and into the real world if you are to make progress.

I sympathise though. I’m very shy and introverted by nature.
Don’t laugh!

I hide it well these days, but that wasn’t always the case.

It’s all about fear.
Fear of being misunderstood.
Fear of being rejected.
Fear of being laughed at.

The only to fix this at the root is to not-be-shy and realise nobody is laughing. In essence, you have to push outside that comfortable cocoon a little at a time and not give up at the occasional set-back. Every once in a while someone might laugh, but most of the time they will not… or if they laugh it’ll be with you and not at you.

Now, that’s not to say you cannot do some things to stack the odds in your favour. Find the right people to be un-shy around first. Start with making little jokes so you can interpret any snigger in that context. If possible, time your attempt around changes in surroundings (change of schools, change of cities, change of work) so that nobody will look at you like you’re suddenly someone else. Find the easy wins, and then build on those.

The book above has a few good ratings as well, and it’s less than a dollar, so if you want another 100 tips to try, it might not hurt. But just keep in mind that as trite as it sounds… the only way to get over your shyness is to start acting as if you’re not shy and let the reality follow.

And I’ve been in remission for well over a decade-and-a-half, but that doesn’t mean I don’t still have my occasional shy day. And there is nothing wrong with that either.

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